A Case of Mistaken Identity

Yes, this truly happened. Shame on me for writing with my eyes closed. Names have been deleted to protect the victim.

My unsuspecting friend: So do you do bids just for Jeff, or for other people too?
me: I'm usually too busy to do them for anyone else, but the other ISS do them for whoever needs them.
Me: I'd like to bid you.
My unsuspecting friend: What for?
Me: To show you my skill at going through you from front to back, paying close attention to all of the details.
My suspecting friend: I feel creepy.

It reminds me of one time when I walked out of a public restroom and a guy outside said, "Did you notice anything strange about that bathroom?"

I said, "You know, (lightbulb) I noticed they didn't have any urinals in there." The guy nodded at me, my idiocy apparent on his face as he pointed to the women's restroom sign.

If there are two things the old R is good at, it's getting into accidents and embarrassing situations. If that doesn't call for the old 'So be it..." I don't know what does.

R.

Jock Straps and Tales of Woe

I'm not sure if you have ever considered it, but being sales support is a lot like being athletic support: both have to cover the...

But I digress. The stories are still flowing. My honey and I sat down and looked at what's needed to fill out the collection; it looks like six more stories will round it out nicely. It was a bit of a dilemma figuring out what to do because I want the collection to read like like a series of short stories, not a really bad novel. Based on that I am going to hit some obscure events that should smooth out the transitions between story clusters (like the ADIS - GBO cluster, or the TM - TTG - PTJ cluster) and to balance out the stand alone stories with the obviously followed up stories. So six more stories and it will be time to revise with a vengeance.

R.

New Story - Gambler's Luck

I have completed this beast at last, my long short-story. It came in at 7945 words, 15 pages. It was rather hellish to write, but it's gotten good responses so far. I'm so glad to be done with that one I could shake my booty like Ella Enchanted. There is love (of a sort), there is hate, there is intrigue (if you want to call it that), and there is a tower rescue (sort of, but not really). I should note that I had to stop and write another story in the middle of this one. That doesn't really matter on any level, but I wanted to make it clear, or semi-transparent at least.

R.

Lost Opportunities and Personnel Changes

Our bambino ripped us from sleep at 5:05 this morning. I laid in bed coughing because I'm down with the sickness like the guy in that song by Disturbed, keeping my honey and the baby awake until I finally decided to get up and go to work early. It is too bad I didn't just get up and write; I am making progress (too slow to call it good progress) on what I feel will be a good story, one of my best I hope. "Water over the dam or under the bridge or however you want to put it." I just have too much to write and not enough time, and when I have time I don't always use it to my advantage. My wife says that I should be grateful that I don't suffer writer's block, but not getting the stories I have written is equally frustrating in my opinion. Enough on that I suppose.

There have been some changes at the corporate beast that writes my check even as it devours the world; my moody young compadre has taken a job for one of our customers and is moving on, bringing in a new inexperienced but enthusiastic person. It will be very interesting to see how it goes. I wish I could support my family writing.

R.

I Think I'm Addicted to AFI...

Work is a super bummer. I had my annual review today. I received satisfactory remarks on every level, and it earned me my 3% cost of living raise. I imagine a CEO or regional manager making six figures coming up with the idea that a flat percentage raise was the fair way to go; that way the $16,640 forklift operator would be happy knowing that his $520 raise was actually equal to the $3,092.78 raise that went to their $100,000 dollar corporate counterpart. It's right there in the math: 3% for each of them. Just something that's on my mind today.

R.