Do You Know Where Your Make-up Comes From?

In the wild lands to the south, an epidemic has been discovered--the slaying of fat people for the bountiful treasure within. This human lard is then sold to European cosmetic companies for up to $60K a gallon.

R.

For the Love of Books

Setting: Jr. High classroom; kids being noisy because they just have a substitute. Mr. Riotimus gives them their instructions and sits down. Picks up From Puritanism to Postmodernism: A History of American Literature and begins to read. Odd Girl walks up to him and stares intently.

Odd Girl: I've read that before.

Mr. Riotimus: That's great.

Odd Girl: It's a good book.

Mr. Riotimus: I'm glad you liked it.

Odd Girl wanders back to desk, spends a few minutes doing assignment, then starts reading trendy vampire-romance novel. Stands and shuffles back to substitute.

Odd Girl: That's such a great book (referring to Puritanism).

Mr. Riotimus: (Too dumbfounded to speak).

Odd Girl: I've read it, like, fifteen times!

Mr. Riotimus: (Wishes he didn't have to read it even once as it is heavy on information but light on any of the things that made the works it discusses so pleasant to experience).

Odd Girl: You probably want to know how it ends, but you'll have to finish it and find out for yourself!

Mr. Riotimus: . . . I suppose I will. Thanks.

Finis

Hope your reading endeavors are treating you as well as your writing ones. Write on.

R.

Zanpakuto

There are them as that don't know what a zanpakuto is, and that's a real shame.



Don't cut yourself.

R.

"Do try my stew . . ."

The scene I would like you to watch starts at about 7:30 and may be the greatest scene ever laid down on film. Yes; yes it is. It goes until around 8:07 or so.



R.

What I'm Doing Now

It's tearing you apart, wondering what that is. Well . . . I'm still plugging along on my MA; I've just endured an enlightening read of James Joyce's Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man - that didn't thrill me, but I suppose everybody studying literature is forced to read it at some point. I was impressed with the dialogue. That's about all I can say for it. I've had to read some other more satisfying books, but if I post about them I will do it later.

In spite of my failure to report the numbers, I have been writing, beefing up my portfolio to try to get into an MFA of Creative Writing for next fall. I am getting a good chunk of short stories in my new series put together, with a respectable number of segments jotted down in my pocket notebook. I'm pleased with where the characters are going and the potential the series has. I've not been able to come up with a title for the it, which is strange because I often start with a title or know what the title should be once I begin to grasp the story. What do you call a series about a cowboy in the early-to-mid nineties? I hopefully will come up with something bettet than The [Main-Character] Stories soon.

I've come across a fairly fun band called Skillet. They sound like a cross of Hinder, Evanescence, and Plumb. It's always nice to find something hard-rockish that won't leave the kids scarred if they hear it. Here's one of their tunes set to a segment of Bleach (for you Zilla).


Watch Bleach Skillet-Monster in Anime  |  View More Free Videos Online at Veoh.com

Write On.

R.

Arachnid

A spider bit me upon the leg

A great long drink of Dixie dregs

Yellow pustules of venom full

Sour poison blistering cruel

Spider, you did avoid mine eye

Someday soon I hope you die

Dear Government . . .

Mr. Obama, the Congress, assorted yes men and bureaucrats of all different sorts:

There was nothing wrong with my state managed student loans. By retroactively purchasing them you are in fact hurting me, my family, and my ability to ever contribute gainfully to this society. This heavy-handed approach to creating a crisis so that you can claim to have fixed something is wrong, and I think you know it.

Sincerely,

Riotimus, an American